When Loss Becomes a Catalyst for Change
Hello Reader,
Kim Downey didn't set out to become a leader in physician mental health advocacy. She was a physical therapist navigating two years of medical crises—thyroid cancer, complications, and breast cancer—when her world shifted in an unexpected way.
At what should have been a routine follow-up appointment, she learned that one of her doctors had died by suicide a month earlier.
That moment changed everything.
"I got this sick feeling in my stomach," Kim shares. "I just thought that he had taken his own life, and it turned out to be true. I felt a calling to support doctors."
What started as one person's grief has grown into Stand Up for Doctors—a global movement bringing physician stories to light, breaking down mental health barriers, and creating the kind of support system healthcare providers desperately need.
The Numbers We Can't Ignore
The frequently cited statistic is stark: more than 400 physicians die by suicide each year in the United States alone. That's more than one doctor every day.
But as Kim points out, these numbers are likely underreported. Families have the right to privacy. Deaths may not be correctly identified. The actual toll is probably higher—and that's just in America, not counting the UK, Australia, or the rest of the world where physician colleagues face similar struggles.
The ripple effects extend far beyond statistics. Kim co-wrote an article with Dr. Todd Otten titled "The Long-Term Impacts of Physician Suicide on Doctors and Patients." Dr. Otten had four colleagues take their own lives. Three years after her own doctor's death, Kim still becomes emotional discussing it.
"I couldn't believe it's been three years because everything that happened to me felt more recent than that," she reflects. "There's not a lot of people talking about the impact on patients when a doctor takes their own life."
The Real and Perceived Barriers
The obstacles physicians face in accessing mental health care are both systemic and cultural.
Unlike Kim's physical therapy license renewal—which only asks about felony convictions—physicians, nurses, and pharmacists face intrusive questions about mental health treatment on their licensing applications. The catch-22 is brutal: answering "yes" can lead to monitoring, employment barriers, or licensure complications. Answering "no" means lying on official documents.
Kim and Corey Feist (Dr. Lorna Breen's brother-in-law) recently published "Healthcare Workers Deserve Care Too: How to Protect Their Mental Health" in KevinMD, highlighting six essential pillars:
1. Accessible and affordable mental health care (including options outside standard 9-5 hours)
2. Confidential professional health program support (some physicians cross state lines to avoid local disclosure)
3. Equal privacy in mental health care (no mandatory disclosure of treatment details)
4. Confidential peer support (one-on-one connection with someone who truly understands)
5. Education and training on mental health (starting in medical school and continuing throughout careers)
6. Supportive pathways for reentry (removing astronomical hurdles for returning to practice after seeking help)
"The culture of medicine has to change, and it needs to start in med school," Kim emphasizes.
The Leadership Connection
One of the most powerful insights Kim shares involves trauma-informed leadership.
"Sometimes leaders have experienced their own trauma and they don't have the bandwidth to acknowledge the trauma of their healthcare workers," she observes. "If the leaders aren't well, they aren't going to be showing up as their best selves for the people who work for them."
This creates cascading effects. Leaders carry their own trauma. Healthcare workers carry theirs. Patients arrive with theirs. Without trauma-informed approaches at every level, no one has the capacity to truly see each other's humanity.
The solution starts at the top. Leaders need access to trauma-informed coaching and therapy themselves. They need to model the well-being behaviors they want to see. And they need to create genuinely supportive environments—not performative ones where mental health resources exist on paper but are subtly discouraged in practice.
As Kim puts it: "They need to walk the walk, not just talk the talk."
Small Steps, Real Change
For physicians quietly struggling, Kim offers this from her collaboration with Dr. Pam Wible: "When you're feeling really low, even asking for help feels like too much work. But you have to take that step. Don't wait till you feel like doing it."
Tell one person. A coach. A therapist. A mentor. A friend. A partner. Anyone you trust.
"Asking for help is a strength, not a weakness. That is the most brave, courageous thing you can do."
She also encourages questioning limiting beliefs through a simple exercise: write down everything you're thinking at the end of the day. Then separate facts from thoughts. Circle the limiting beliefs—"I'm the worst doctor in the universe"—and ask yourself: Is that really true? What if the opposite is also true?
And start with the smallest acts of self-advocacy. Dr. Michael Hirsch fought for—and eventually won—a lunch break during his colonoscopy schedule. Once he did, colleagues followed. Small changes create cultural shifts.
"Everybody has at least 10 to 20 percent control of their day," Kim reminds us. "What can you control?"
From Water Boy to Team Captain
Kim describes her journey with characteristic humility. When she first started connecting with physicians on LinkedIn, she told her physician coach, Dr. Michael Hirsch, that she felt like "the water boy"—cheering from the sidelines but not really on the team.
His response? "What makes you think you're not on the team?"
Now, physicians around the world call her "the central hub," "their leader," and "a super connector." Dr. Simon Craig, author of "From Hurting to Healing," wrote in his endorsement of Kim's book: "In a short space of time, Kim Downey has become a very important voice in healthcare."
She models her work after her friend Po Murray, who founded Newtown Action Alliance after the Sandy Hook tragedy. Po went from being a mother of four to conducting press conferences with presidents and traveling internationally for gun violence prevention work.
"It goes to show you what one person can do if they want to make a difference," Kim says. "Some of it is just keep showing up."
What You Can Do
If you're a leader, the path forward is clear: prioritize caring for your people.
Make mental health resources genuinely accessible and confidential.
Train yourself and your team to recognize risk factors.
Create a culture where vulnerability is safe, not punished.
If you're a clinician struggling, take one small step.
Tell one trusted person.
Question one limiting belief.
Claim one moment of your day for yourself—even if it's just five extra minutes in your car or ten minutes in the bathroom.
And remember: you deserve the same compassion you extend to your patients every day.
Learn More:
Kim's work continues through her YouTube channel "Stand Up for Doctors," her collaborative book "White Coats, Courageous Hearts: True Stories of Doctors Reclaiming Their Humanity in a System That Challenges It," and her monthly Substack newsletter. She's also planning an Epic Physician Retreat for fall 2026 in Briarcliff Manor, New York.
Find her on LinkedIn and at standupfordoctors.org.
As Kim reminds us: "Every time a doctor shares their story, another doctor feels less alone."
What small step will you take today? Reply and let me know—I'd love to hear from you.
🎧 Listen to the podcast sneak peek episode below and listen to the full episode on YouTube, Apple, Spotify, Podbean, or Amazon Music.
What's inspiring us this week:
The courage and bravery of an Australian man who stopped a terrorist shooter, Ahmed El Ahmed, at Bondi Beach in Sydney, Australia during a heinous shooting on the first night of Chanukah this Sunday December 14, 2025. Courageous. Brave. And instinctively doing the right thing, from the inside out. May we all continue to stand in solidarity with our colleagues of Jewish faith and light a candle and stand for peace, love, and honesty. Chanukah Sameach!
The Practice: Celebrating Wins
We get more of what we focus on. The practice of gratitude and celebrating the goodness of life is the first step in changing our brains, mindsets, and circumstances for the better.
We had a lovely virtual summit last week, medThriving, with great talks, smooth execution, and wonderful attendees. Filling our mind, brain, and heart with the skills, knowledge, and motivation to make that 1% change...for the better of our own lives first.
Stay mindful and keep leading,
Lillian
Founder & CEO
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